Reflection

Why are you fasting Tae? Well because I feel like there has been a lot of chaos in my life at the beginning of the month and I tend to stress unnecessarily, so Im doing this to gain some clarity, and guidance and just get myself back together. Throughout this process, Ive been asking for guidance in where ever it is needed, to be a better parent to my children and wife and discipline. Today is day 5 and I honestly dont recall any fast being this difficult before. Day 3 seemed to be the most hungry Ive been throughout the day and yesterday was the most trying on my emotional state. I was like I was knocking at depressions door yesterday and I have no idea why. I reached out to a few people in regards to what I was feeling and was told its part of the detox process. I was also told to drink more water and tea, which I didnt do a whole lot of yesterday. So today I have my water on hand, and my tea sitting in front of me. I give thanks for the process and for having people to provide some guidance. Last night when I was in the shower, I asked why I was doing this because I dont feel like Im getting any answers, Im not seeing any signs or hearing my messages. Then it hit me this morning, you asked to be a better parent, has jr not been trying you more? Is that not an opportunity to be a better parent, to make a change in how you address him and the issue? Have you not been fighting with yourself about quitting this fast? But here you are back at it, staying disciplined and acknowledging what youve gone through and addressing how to change it? hmm... just when I thought this was a bust.. Heres to day 5 with plenty of water and tea.